


dimension jumping was easy, time travel in another thing entirely

by DeadAndAlive



Series: Hogwarts Commission of Dimension Travel, Time Travel, and Idiots [1]
Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Banter, Bickering, Comfort, Cookies, Dimension Travel, Domestic Fluff, F/F, Fluff, Fluff and Humor, M/M, Multi, Multiple Tom and Harry's, Tea, The two Tomarry tags are seperate and not a mistake, Time Travel, Will add more as the story progresses - Freeform, it's just brief but i'll add it in anyway
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-02-26
Updated: 2021-03-02
Packaged: 2021-03-17 02:42:16
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 6,649
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29710428
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DeadAndAlive/pseuds/DeadAndAlive
Summary: “I ran the coordinates by Blaise before he left, Luna, and even Hermione, we are not ending up in that Dumbledore dimension again.” Both men’s faces soured at the memory. That dimension should have been thrown out of the garbage disposal and burned in the middle of space, forever forgotten by the universe. Harry wouldn’t forgive Theo for that. Never.As Senior Ground Officers for the Hogwarts Commission, it was Tom and Harry's job to watch over a handful of Dimensions under Serial TMRHJP (which were more than 4 thousand, by the way!). They should be paid more than they do, honestly.
Relationships: Draco Malfoy & Harry Potter, Draco Malfoy & Theodore Nott, Harry Potter/Tom Riddle, Harry Potter/Tom Riddle | Voldemort, Luna Lovegood & Theodore Nott, Neville Longbottom & Luna Lovegood, Neville Longbottom & Luna Lovegood & Harry Potter, Neville Longbottom & Luna Lovegood & Theodore Nott, Neville Longbottom/Theodore Nott, Ron Weasley/Blaise Zabini (mentioned), Theodore Nott & Harry Potter
Series: Hogwarts Commission of Dimension Travel, Time Travel, and Idiots [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2183442
Comments: 9
Kudos: 21





	1. Eat Cookies and Tea, You'll Never Know If They Contain Drugs Or Not

**Author's Note:**

> This fic will only be a few chapters long, like 10 or so chapters, maybe less until I move on to the next work of the series
> 
> This is also indirectly a hype fic for an upcoming fic that is probably only still a month or two into production. Sadly, I won't post the first chapter nor the prologue until I reach Chapter 10 or Chapter 5.
> 
> Anywho, enjoy the fluff and my sad attempt at humor. Cheers

“Are you sure you inputted the correct coordinates? I wouldn’t like to enter another dimension without the proper gear, darling,” Tom said, facing Harry as he adjusted his own gear near the Telepad. The shorter boy looked at Tom from where he was getting ready, an offended look gracing his features. The audacity of Tom thinking he’d make that _mistake_ again. It wasn’t entirely _his_ fault that he forgot what the serial letters meant.

He wasn’t ever going touch nor want to see those case folders anymore. Those 149 (yes, Harry looked up the total case count) dimensions will never see the day of light if Harry had any say in it. He knew they had to be checked once and a while, he wasn’t doing it. No siree. He was handing over those to Dumbledore and spare himself the trauma.

“I ran the coordinates by Blaise before he left, Luna, and even Hermione, we are not ending up in that Dumbledore one again.” Both men’s faces scrunched up at the memory. That dimension should have been thrown out of the garbage disposal and burned in the middle of the space. Harry wouldn’t forgive Theo for that. _Never_.

“Good. I don’t want to bleach my eyes again with Greek fire. I will find it and use it to burn those dimensions apart. I will even travel back to TMRHJP-0000092136-01 if I have to achieve that.” That dimension had been interesting, _to say the least_ , after what happened _._ How Tom got hold of Greek fire was beyond Harry but he gave up questioning Tom’s ways. It was better on his mental sanity not to.

Before Harry could talk back, Theo walked into the room, a file in his hand. “Are you guys ready to go?” Harry wasn’t having it.

“You’re our handler for this mission?!" Harry exclaimed; incredulous belief etched on his face. There was no way Theo was going to be their handler again. He still hasn’t and won’t ever forgive Theo for the incident of ’29. That fucker didn’t deserve forgiveness for the scene they saw in that dimension a year ago. He was only free from consequences because Snape saw over the aftermath of the mission and that greasy bastard doesn’t let anything happen to his Snakes.

“It was a year ago, give me some slack here!” Theo exclaimed back, already walking to the control panel and ignoring the death glares Harry continuedly sent him. “I had to deal with two bickering idiots the day before and messing up the mission, and I already promised Blaise that I’ll cover your mission for him because they had an emergency mission. Blame Wood and Weasley.”

Harry, ever the stubborn idiot (Tom wonders why he even considered dating _and_ marrying him in the first place), relented to the explanation but didn’t forgive him. Once a bastard, always a bastard, as Harry often says.

“Fine.”

They all went back to getting ready. After a few minutes of silence, filled only with Theo muttering and rustling, he looked back up to the pair getting ready. “You guys ready to go? We still have some time before you’re due to leave, we could eat for a bit.”

Harry quietly nodded at Theo before looking at Tom, who was silent during the whole affair. He was adjusting the cuffs of his button-down, looking deep in thought. His brows were furrowed as he blankly stared at the floor of the Telepad, his hands just automatically working through the motions like it was second nature, and for Tom, it was; When you’re working this job for almost decades and not getting any older, those actions came as natural as breathing.

“Tom?” Tom hummed in acknowledgment, tightening the wand holster around his right forearm but not truly in the conversation. What was he thinking about? Harry needed to know. If they messed this mission up because Tom’s head was up in the clouds, Snape will do anything to get him and Harry demoted and Harry will be damned if he’ll be pulled down by the git again. “Are you okay?”

Tom blinked, and once more before looking at the two other occupants of the room. “What? No, yeah, I’m okay,” He said, you know, like a liar. It was obvious that something was bothering him; the well-composed but a centimeter out of place hair, the slanted parallel footing instead of Tom’s usual V-shaped one, and the slightly glossy look in his eyes were all clear indicators that Tom was out of it.

Well, to Harry anyway. Partners were supposed to know everything about each other; from the way they spoke to their body mannerisms. Partners were picked when there’s a new recruit or a senior officer retires and Tom was 10 years his senior but he knew for a fact that Harry was the only one who knew Tom the closest. After all, after working together for almost 4 decades and being together for 1/3 of those years, Harry knew Tom and Tom knew Harry.

Harry looked at Theo and the handler quickly got the point and left the room, announcing, “I’ll go check the mission files with Luna for a bit.” Before quickly leaving.

Finally having privacy, Harry approached his husband, still spaced out and deep in thought. He cupped the underside of Tom’s face and lifted it to face him before pressing a chaste kiss against Tom’s lips. “Stop being cold-hearted and tell me what’s bothering you,” Harry murmured. He pressed their foreheads together, which was a feat in and of itself considering Harry’s height stopped at Tom’s neck.

Tom still didn’t answer. Instead, he wrapped his arms around Harry’s waist and just stared at his husband’s concerned eyes, the ever-beautiful emerald eyes staring right back.

Shaking his head, Tom was still silent as he nuzzled against Harry’s neck. Harry sighed but petted Tom’s curls, mouth quirking up at Tom’s growing slouch at the gesture. “What’s on your mind?” Harry asked again but only got Tom nuzzling into his neck more than ever.

“Did you have a nightmare again?” Harry asked and finally got a response in the form of a nod against his neck and the arms around him tightening.

He continued petting Tom’s curls.

“Was it about a mission fail?” He murmured and he felt Tom nod again. Harry hummed and cupped the underside of Tom’s face again, lifting it up to meet his eyes.

Now that they were alone, Harry could see Tom’s barriers fall and the pure unadulterated fear and love in Tom’s eyes for Harry. The sleeplessness haunting his face, the anxiousness for this mission; Harry saw and felt it all, even if it’s faint.

Harry kissed Tom before pulling away and cradled Tom by the underside of his face again. “As much as I say otherwise,” Harry started, brushing his thumbs against Tom’s cheek and relishing at the sight of Tom’s fluttering eyes before continuing. “I trust Theo with being our handler for the mission. Plus, look at the bright side.”

Tom’s brow furrowed at the statement. “What bright side?” He grumbled, nuzzling at the hand cradling his face.

“The dimension we’re going to already knows us.”

“Serial TMRHJP-0000012587-01?”

“Which else would it be?”

* * *

Theo sighed in relief as he stepped out of the room. A quiet Riddle was a scary Riddle to anyone but Harry, and that included Theo. When Riddle was talking, at the very least you might have an idea of what he was thinking but a quiet Riddle deep in thought was a Riddle that everyone in the whole commission thought was scary.

He waved at Cedric as the older man passed by, internally wincing at the few cuts the Hufflepuff Senior Officer had on his body. Seems the poor guy had a solo mission again in a Dark Sector.

As a Senior Intelligence Officer in comparison to the commission, Theo was subjected to a lot of things. From first starting out as a Ground Officer with Neville before being promoted as an Intelligence Officer and Neville being promoted as a Documentation Officer, Theo knew the troubles of keeping the peace of different dimensions and timelines. When he ran into Blaise and recommended him as a Ground Officer in the commission, when he and Harry ran into each other on their respective solo missions, and when he almost failed a mission, Theo knew the troubles of his job.

While the miscommunications and misinput (more like goading from Harry out of curiosity) on the events of year ’29 was a harmless mistake on his part, Theo knew the consequences of messing up and almost putting his co-officers in danger on the account of not knowing the dimension. He vowed to not do that again, it gave him nightmares to just think if Neville got himself thrown in that situation.

Theo sighed as he ran a hand through his hair. There was no use for worrying like this. He knew the Ground Officers can handle it and with a Senior Officer like Riddle and Harry? Theo was assured that they can handle the missions.

Entering the Files Room, Theo inhaled the herb tea he knew Luna was making in the small breakroom of the room, already looking forward to the snacks she and Neville usually made around this time. While Tom, Theo, and the other people in Slytherin quarter had Snape as their Head Officer, people working in the Files Department worked under Flitwick and the man was one of the sweetest officers in the whole commission, handling different people from different quarters while also keeping track of information from different dimensions and timelines.

Even if Theo won’t admit it out loud, he respects Flitwick for handling the Files Department for so long and doing such an amazing job as its department’s head.

“Oh, Theo!” Neville greeted, already handing him a freshly baked cookie straight from the oven. “Which files do you need now?”

Theo smiled at Neville, taking a big bite out of the treat before wiping his mouth and setting it on a clean biscuit tray. “Can’t I see my lovely boyfriend at this time of day?” He teased, looping his arms around the Gryffindor’s waist. “I was starving too, love. Can you not blame a man for wanting to eat your lovely baking?”

Theo absolutely loved the way Neville blushed from ear to ear, the way the other man stuttered a response.

“Well, no,” Neville said, looping his arms around Theo’s neck and leaning back against the breakroom counter. “But I do know that Riddle and Harry have a check-up mission due to be done today and I know that you’re the handler of that mission this week.”

“And what if the mission might be done now and just didn’t know?” Theo countered, nuzzling against Neville’s neck.

“I know I’m right because I ran by the pair’s mission and the check-up mission that they’re due for is for Serial TMRHJP-0000012587-01. You only took one file folder earlier when you left. TMRHJP-12587-01 is a big dimension to cover and that’s why it has its own shelf in the files.”

“You’re no fun, Longbottom,” Theo murmured, tightening his hold against his boyfriend and smiling at the small laugh Neville let out.

“But you’re still dating me, Nott.”

At that moment, the wonderful Documentation Officer that is Luna Lovegood entered the breakroom, beelining towards the teapot filled with tea, and removed the tea infuser before making herself a cup, as if in a trance, an angry trance that it.

Theo chuckled at her antics, already having an idea of the reason why she was acting like this, but not exactly.

When she finally made her cup, she lifted it to her lips and sipped, Theo finally seeing the tension leave her body. This made Theo wonder; which Ground Officer stressed Luna Lovegood this time?

“Who did you deal with this time, Lovegood?”

Some missions and handlers required Documentation officers in missions, like high stealth and complicated assassinations with Blaise and Weasley 06 or with long-standing dimensions like what Riddle and Harry deal with, but some handlers (like Theo and Hermione) were skilled enough to take over and handle the mission as both handler and information officers.

Luna wasn’t as lucky though.

“Marietta Edgecombe and Cho Chang,” came Luna’s curt reply, still cradling the cup of tea she had, occasionally taking small sips.

Marietta Edgecombe and Cho Chang were Ravenclaw Ground Officers Lune Lovegood hated with a burning passion. Despite being smart officers (or on Chang’s side of the pair), they were bullies that constantly targeted Luna back at the academy. When the ranking exams happened, Luna and Chang were qualified to become Documentation Officers while Edgecombe was stuck as a Ground Officer. Chang wanted to stick with her than be a Documentation Officer like Luna was.

Theo let out a wounded noise.

Luna sighed at Theo, sympathizing with herself. “Oh, I know,” she said, sipping out of her cup. “I should have declined and told Clearwater that I was busy with files.”

“While I pity you and all, I need files and I only managed to realize that when I entered the Telepad #2.”

Luna smiled a mischievous one that told Theo the exact thing he didn’t need. “And you couldn’t escape Harry and Riddle, right?” Theo could only lamely nod in defeat as Neville ran a hand through his hair. Theo sighed and leaned into the touch.

“Come on, Theodore, Riddle might get antsy now,” Luna teased, grabbing herself one of Neville’s cookies before leaving the breakroom, already heading straight for the search panel in the middle of the main room.

“Sometimes I wonder why I deal with her,” Theo muttered, untangling himself out of Neville’s warm embrace and grabbing the half-eaten cookie he had earlier before exiting the breakroom too, Neville following quickly in his stead.

* * *

“I come back bearing refreshments,” Theo announced, holding a tin of cookies in his left hand and a tray of thermoses in his right. He quickly set them down on the handler’s desk, along with a satchel Harry knew to be full of files of TMRHJP-12587-01, before offering the tin and thermos to the pair of Senior Officers. Harry quickly put two and two together, and greedily taking the tin and thermos he knew the contents to be made by Neville and Luna back at the Files Department. Their snacks are to die for and Harry knew it’ll help Tom calm even more before a mission.

Harry moaned as he took a bite of the cookie, relishing the melting chocolate chip in his mouth. “Neville’s?” He asked, mouth full of cookies and crumbs. Tom reached out and wiped Harry’s cheek before taking one for himself.

“Of course, who did you take me for? A scammer?” Theo answered, sitting down in the handler’s chair before putting the satchel in his lap. He quickly took out 3 copies of the timeline folders (which were single tablets instead of thick paper folders), passing the two copies of the folders to Tom who was the least preoccupied out of the two Senior Officers. It wasn’t Harry’s fault that Neville baked so good, that man was a genius.

“What year will you guys be checking?” Theo asked, idly sliding through the timeline and sipping through his own thermos. Harry knew it was herbal tea this time from the smell of Luna’s signature tea wafting the room.

“1996.” Tom bit into his own cookie before continuing. “It’s one of the most active years in the timeline considering the events that happen.”

Theo pulled a thoughtful face and narrowed his eyes, squinting at somewhere in the room, before looking at Tom with those narrowed eyes. “So, Summer of 1996? When Black moves in?” He asked, sipping the thermos in his hand. “It’s a good start.”

Tom sipped on his own thermos tea ( _probably deciding that the brew was good for his tastes_ , Harry quietly mused) before telling Theo, “Right around that Harry’s birthday.”

“Have us arrive when that Draco is just about to leave that Tom’s office.”

Just then, Draco Lucius (Pretentious) Malfoy, walked in, questioning, “What the fuck did I do to you, four eyes.”

Harry cheekily grinned at him before grabbing a cookie and offering the tin to the potion master. “Cookie?” He asked, his grin widening when Draco grumbled and sat down beside Theo at the handler’s table, grabbing a cookie when he passed.

“What brings you here?”

Draco raised a challenging brow at Tom before answering. “This dear cousin of mine forgot to get what was asked of him when he visited his dear Godfather and my mother asked me to deliver this to you, dear cousin,” Draco spat. Harry took no offense nor hostility from the potion master’s words; they spoke that way about each other for years even before the academy.

Harry took a bite out of his cookie before countering. “It’s not my fault that Sirius kept talking about old missions and steered me away from the kitchen.”

“It was your responsibility to get the treats from my mother.”

“How the fuck do I even remember that when my head was full of old tactics and stories?”

“Getting them when you first enter the house! Just tell dear cousin, Sirius, you have something to get.”

“Draco that’s rude and you fucking know it.”

Finally, Tom had enough of their bickering. “Boys,” Tom reprimanded, quickly shutting the two up. “While I appreciate the banter, you two sound like a bickering couple talking about forgetting the groceries. Never mind the fact that I’m the one married to Harry here.”

“Got jealous, love?” Harry teased, grabbing his thermos from the table and taking a sip.

Tom lovingly looked at him before the gaze quickly deadpanned. “I’ve been married to you for around 10 years, darling. I don’t get jealous. I’ve seen and surveyed dimensions where we weren’t together. This bickering is child’s play.”

Harry just hummed and patted Tom’s cheek, saying, “Don’t be afraid to admit that you’re jealous.”

“So, anyway,” Theo started, pointedly ignoring the two Senior Officers a table over, and instead faced Draco. “What really brings you here, Dray?” Theo asked. “Shouldn’t you be in the Med Bay? Blaise and Weasley are due to finish their assassination mission right now.”

“I just wanted to tell itty-bitty Potter here to get the treats from my officer later. Can’t a guy have some slack?” Draco mused, taking another cookie from the tin, moaning when he bit into it. Neville’s cookies will never not be amazing. “I’ve just dealt with 10 injured students a few minutes ago. They had Capture the Flag training.”

“Are they first years or second years?”

“Second years.”

“Oh, I remember those,” Harry mused, looking up from the tablet. “They’re learning about more offense moves, right?”

Draco heavily sighed, a pained look overcoming his features. “Yes,” came the curt reply.

Before any of them could continue the conversation, an announcement came over the comms. “Draco Malfoy, please report to the Med Bay,” It reported. Draco’s eyes widened, sitting stiff for a few milliseconds before he shot up and ran out of the Telepad room they were in. “Draco Malfoy, please report to the Med Bay.”

“Bloody fucking hell!”

Harry swore he heard a crash before faint, “Sorry!” from Draco.

Tom shook his head. “Well,” he started, looking over at Harry. “Shall do the check-up now?”

Harry took the last bite of his cookie before nodding. “Yeah,” he agreed. “I want to get this over with. Hermione asked me to help me file some stuff.” He stood up and grabbed both his and Tom’s wizarding cloaks to blend in but it didn’t really matter, they won’t meet any other wizard that they won’t expect; they won’t arrive in Diagon Alley first thing.

He handed Tom his cloak after the man finished his thermos full of tea. “Are you ready to see them again?” Harry asked, putting his cloak on.

“Yes,” Tom admitted. “But at the same time, I’m not.”

“Kids, remember to put on your contacts,” Theo reminded. “Or else we’ll get our asses beat by Luna and Pansy if we don’t get video footage of the mission.”

Harry quietly shivered. He didn’t love Luna nor Pansy when they were like that; they were like demons who just crawled out of Hades. Then again Tom was like that when Harry woke him early without any reason so it didn’t really matter. “I really do not get your fear for those women, they’re just practical and want to be sure of the files,” Tom admitted, doing a final check of his gear (and also discreetly checking his contacts but Harry saw) as Harry stretched beside him and Theo already double and triple-checking the coordinates. After all, they wouldn’t like another repeat of the disaster of ’08.

“I had classes with Luna back at the academy and she was a nightmare during the exams. I wouldn’t like to imagine what would happen if I forgot to get video evidence, _again_.”

Stepping on the teleport pad, Tom and Harry, dressed in wizard robes and their regular gear for dimension jumping, did a final check for connection and as Theo gave them the go signal, Harry felt a pull at his navel before everything in his purview swirled in a multitude of colors before it all went black.


	2. The Phrase, 'Once A Bastard, Always a Bastard' Is A Statement of Mine That Hasn't Been Proven Wrong Yet

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tom and Harry, now Marvolo and James respectively, finally arrive in Serial TMRHJP-0000012587-01. All you need to know is that James is a bastard. And as Marvolo always says, "Once a Bastard, Always a Bastard". He hasn't been proven wrong yet.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This Chapter is Dedicated to [Kushimani](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kushimani/pseuds/Kushimani), like the queen she is so here 👑
> 
> Other than that, You might not see another fic for a few days or so cause school fucking sucks. Cheers!

Harry and Tom walked up the long garden path, talking as they did so under a quick silencing charm. Honestly, why did pureblood manors always have lavish driveways? They don’t drive cars nor carriages that needed to be parked in the main building, outhouses have and always will hold that purpose.

“D’you reckon he already sees us?”

“I don’t need to consider nor reckon anything, darling. I _know_ he already sees us,” Tom said, looking up and surveying the building in its entirety. It was a shame how it dwindled a bit over the century of its recent occupancy, but it still looks as imposing and intimidating as ever. “And if the wards still work, which I know those two will be too paranoid to ever those let die, _his lord graciousness_ already felt through the wards and already held Draco up in his office.”

Harry quirked a grin that could rival the Cheshire cat before proclaiming, “Wonderful.”

The weather was a bit cold that day; storm clouds looming over the horizon, the wind _just_ a bit colder than you would expect, and if you paid close attention, you’d hear the waves sloshing at the cliffs the manor was resting over and overlooking the North Atlantic. The weather was quite a miracle considering it was the summer but they weren’t in Central England nor were they in the United Kingdom. Let’s be realistic, Salazar Slytherin was an Irish Wizard and a powerful one at that; he’d have his manor at the northernmost tip of Ireland if he had any say in it, and he probably had.

“Marvolo!” A voice called, quickly followed by a “James!”

There stood Harry Potter of Dimension Serial TMRHJP-0000012587-01, or as what Tom’s husband (and resident idiot) liked to call, ‘Boy-Who-Decided-2-Lives-Weren’t-Enough'. He was impatiently waiting at the main entrance of the manor and, if he squinted hard enough, Tom could see the beautifully designed glass windows adorning the main meeting hall of the manor.

“2-Lives!” Harry greeted back, outwardly grinning at the slightly younger-looking Harry who looked a bit disgruntled at the nickname. Well too bad, Harry wasn’t going to change it at all.

“Harry,” Tom nodded at the younger boy. Gods, the names are going to hurt Tom’s head if they won’t transition now. “Who’s in Voldemort’s office at the moment?” He asked, pointedly ignoring the small grin etching its way onto his husband’s face like he was Weasley 04 and 05 pranking the commission before acting like they had no clue who did it. If Tom had less dignity, he’d probably do the same.

“Draco, at the moment, why?” The younger Harry’s eyes narrowed in suspicion of his two guests before realizing the proper reason why they feeling giddy. “You’re going to mess with him, aren’t you?”

Tom inelegantly snorted as his husband lifted his aviator glasses and placed them on his head, effectively pinning his bangs back (which Tom thought was _hot as fuck_ , by the way), before snorting too. Harry quickly looked to the side before back at younger Harry as if saying, ‘Look at this kid being ironic’ before deadpanning at the younger (older?) boy.

“ _Of course_ , I want to mess with this Malfoy,” James (Tom’s husband and formerly known as Harry) exclaimed. “I have a vendetta against my Draco at the moment and I want to make due. Now are you going to let us in or are we going to sit around the garden like Amy and Laurie in ‘Little Women’?”

This dimension’s Harry huffed in disbelief before mockingly bowing at them, opening the door wider and all.

“Well, thank you!” James exclaimed, effectively sounding both patronizing and praising.

* * *

_“It’s an art, Tom. If you took those classes back at the academy then you would’ve known by now.”_

_  
“Harry, darling, love of my life, how the fuck did you forget I didn’t attend the Academy?”_

* * *

As they walked up the stairs and to Voldemort’s office, Marvolo and James touched up on their respective glamour and “disguises”. It didn’t really need any touching up, per se, they just haven’t gotten used to being in these disguises after a week of no use. Wedding anniversaries and all, you have to understand.

“How’re you guys faring?” Harry asked, peering down where he was a few steps above them, and smirked as he saw a small hickey on James’s neck, the mark _just_ visible from where Harry was. He let out a long whistle at James. “Never mind, then,” He teased.

“Shut up, Harry,” James countered, already knowing of the blackmail he had on his look alike. James waited the moment they entered the office before pointing out, “You drew a sketch of your Tom Riddle at 9 years old and that’s the only portrait from your childhood that you can proudly say you did.” James could only smirk when he saw Harry pale and the foul look sent towards him when he heard:

“What’s this now?” Came the teasing baritone James knew and expected the whole time. It was _his lord graciousness,_ Voldemort. James wasn’t stupid in the slightest, he was half-blind sometimes but not stupid. Being in the commission for more than 5 decades was full proof that Harry wasn’t stupid.

“Voldemort,” James mockingly bowed, relishing the small squeak from this dimension’s Draco Malfoy. “I see you’ve grown a nose.” Tom (Voldemort) scoffed at the blatant disrespect but didn’t do anything else, further scaring this dimension’s Malfoy. James knew that only one thought in his mind: who were these idiots that decided to disrespect the Dark Lord?

“James, as disrespectful as ever,” Voldemort greeted back before turning to Marvolo. “You haven’t gotten him a leash as I suggested?”

Marvolo scoffed as he leaned against the door-side wall. Of course, he’d gotten his husband on a leash, Marvolo had gotten him on the metaphorical one decades ago, and a literal one was, well, it didn’t end in the way Marvolo wanted it to end. It had gotten, let’s say, it had gotten a bit spicy.

James smirked as crossed his arms and he glanced at Marvolo. “It didn’t end in the way he wanted it to end,” he said, his grin breaking out even more when Harry slung an arm around James’s shoulders, letting out a long whistle as he did.

“My lord,” Draco weakly said, and James could see his perfect side-parted hair go out of place ever so slightly. It made James grin even more.

“Yes, Draco,” Voldemort sighed, an amused one more than a disappointed one. It was a shame really. “You may leave now, and _do not_ say a thing about the recent events of this room.”

“Yes, my lord,” Draco hastily said, quickly scrambling out of the room and shutting the office door with a soft _click_.

Voldemort looked at James, brow raised and a lazy smirk gracing his features. “Did your Malfoy annoy you?” He asked, leaning back against his chair and crossing his legs. James couldn’t see the action properly, only the slight shifting from Tom made it clear.

“Mocked me and teased me if anything,” James scoffed, sitting and relaxing quickly relaxing on one of the two armchairs in front of Tom’s desk as Harry removed his arm off James’s shoulders, sitting on the sofa in his equal’s office library on the other side of the room.

Tom gestured to the other only armchair in the room and Marvolo quickly sat in it, making himself comfortable. James huffed; his husband was always so fucking polite even in the most dangerous of situations even during the time when he got hold of the Greek fire. “Any updates?” Marvolo asked, and his gray eyes stared at Tom’s brown and Tom stared back, a silent challenge between them. James heard Harry sigh at the other side of the office, legs crossed and tucked into himself as he read. What is this? A testosterone contest? “What’s happening with you people?”

James quietly snorted to himself as he watched the two Toms, his husband, and his counterpart’s soulmate. Even if it was that kind of contest, Harry had no doubt that they wouldn’t win. If anything, Luna would; if only in the metaphorical sense. That woman, in this dimension and back at the commission, was a force to be reckoned with.

Tom stared at Marvolo once more before answering, a bored drawl on his tongue. It made Marvolo’s face clench. “Shouldn’t you know that from those tablets of yours?” He teased, running a hand through his hair as he sighed. Tom looked back up at Marvolo before continuing. “You always seem to hold it close to you. Surely it should hold more purpose than setting the alarm for you, shouldn’t it?”

That’s the reason why they were so animalistic towards each other? Harry could only watch as Marvolo’s jaw clench and Harry could hear the click when it happened. “Of course, it is more useful than a fucking alarm, Voldemort,” Marvolo said in a clipped tone, his grey eyes swirling in a storm of challenge. “Shouldn’t you know that things are more than they seem? Or do you forget about your precious Diary?”

“Boys,” James called and the two Toms closed their mouths shut. He sighed, at least those two knew when to shut up. Honestly. “We have more things to do than quarrel like 5-year-olds.” James looked at Tom as Marvolo quietly huffed in a put-out manner. James only shook his head and pointedly ignored his husband.

“What’s up with you guys?”

Tom finally sighed and leaned back even more in his chair. James only absently remembered that it took Tom a long while to get used to James and Marvolo to do that; only after he digested the fact that they were them that he even considered doing that. “Nothing interesting,” He said with a shrug. “Black moved into the manor along with Harrison’s werewolf. You’d think how vehement Black was with leaving Grimmauld Place that he’d move in sooner.”

“I imagine living with the likes of you wasn’t as such a benefit as Harry thought it was,” Marvolo quipped, quietly hiding his grin against the hand his head rested on.

Tom glared at Marvolo before biting back. “Though I imagine that’s better than your husband over here nocking your cold pedestal over the years.”

James sighed at the ego competition those two were having before standing up from the armchair and moving to the adjacent seat Harry was sitting on, taking out his watch and placing it on the coffee table.

“D’you want to see the new dimension we discovered?” James asked and Harry looked up from his book at the prospect of seeing a new dimension. He nodded eagerly despite his mental age.

Both Harrys pointedly ignored Tom’s piquing curiosity at the mention of a new dimension and Marvolo’s growl from the other side of the room.

* * *

Both Toms joined the Harrys on both couches, put out expressions on the both of them. It amused James greatly to see those expressions because, at heart, those two megalomaniacs were cats at heart. Annoying little cats that always needed attention and care.

“I’m sorry,” Marvolo muttered beside him and James gave him a small smile as he nodded at the apology. He knew his husband didn’t wholly mean what he said when he was bickering with Tom. He always loved to mess with other versions of him, even if only causing the littlest inconvenience to them.

James looked at the other pair across from them before pulling out his tablet and starting the recording.

* * *

_Watching through the view of a small drone, Harry and Tom sat on a rooftop of one of Diagon Alley’s many shops under a disillusionment charm as they watched the scene unfold through Harry’s tablet, wireless earpieces in their ears to hear._

_A 16, nearly 17-year-old, Tom gazed through a window of Alley’s various apothecaries, feet stopping automatically at the sight he saw through the apothecary window._

_In the warm lighting of the store, a child dressed in a red-furred jacket was sitting on the floor near the door. Chubby, rosy red cheeks were puffed out in a pout. Big emerald eyes glistened with angry tears, and the child’s inky black hair was disheveled. He looked to be around two or so years old._

_They knew something was up when they saw the expression on 16-year-old Tom’s face at the side of 2-year-old Harry._

_Marvolo grimaced and breathed out an “Oh no.” as James grinned and murmured the exact opposite of what his counterpart said._

_“Oh, yes.”_

_The 16-year-old Tom stepped a few steps closer to the apothecary window and the small drone followed and stopped just above the Teen Tom’s shoulder. It didn’t matter if the drone could be sensed because of the countless enchantments and spells the drone was under to be undetected. Not anyone can detect it back at the commission other than Dumbledore, Marvolo, and Snape but this dimension’s Tom was quite a substantial amount weaker than James’s Tom._

_Through the window, Teen Tom (Marvolo and James by extension too) could see five men further inside, three seemingly arguing. Teen Tom’s brow rose when he saw this dimension’s Snape there, one of the three arguing._

_Tom glanced between the little boy and the men. Their backs were turned, all of them focused on whatever they were arguing about. The store’s clerk was nervously watching._

_Not a single eye was on the boy._

_“No…” Marvolo swore. Teen Tom wouldn’t just kidnap baby Harry, wouldn’t he? There was absolutely no reason to. He knew the versions of him didn’t have much of a moral code, even himself didn’t have much of one but Tom wouldn’t stoop as far to kidnap a child. Marvolo saw his counterpart steal his husband’s teen counterpart countless times in other dimensions but they were other dimensions. So far, Marvolo, and by that extension, James, haven’t seen any version of Tom kidnap a child Harry before._

_Emerald eyes looked out the glass door, locking onto Teen Tom’s lone form in the empty street. The eyes lit up, and a bright smile curled pouty pink lips upwards. The child began waving rapidly at him as if he knew Tom. The pair knew he didn’t though. The investigation would have started much sooner if they did._

_Tom’s hand rose and waved back without his say-so._

_Green orbs lit up even brighter, if possible. Tom watched as the boy pushed himself onto wobbly, chubby little legs that were clothed in soft gray pants. Tom nearly sent a disdainful look towards the hideous yellow boots the child was wearing._

_Something like glee filled him as the boy waddled to the door, and pressed yellow gloved fingers to the glass. Green eyes stared up at him, almost begging Tom to take him away from the boredom the boy was surely facing._

_Marvolo only sighed as Tom pushed the door open gently, careful not to make noise or push the child, and the child moved back, eyes lighting up. The moment the door was opened enough, the boy ran out as fast as he could on shaky legs, colliding with Tom’s legs. Arms wrapped around his legs and the child looked up at him, smiling._

_The drone refocused towards the two figures in the street, moving down from above Tom’s shoulder to just beside Harry’s shoulder._

_Tom bent down, a sweet smile on his lips that made the little boy’s face shine brighter, if possible._

_“Hello, little one. I’m Tom. What’s your name?” Tom crooned, tucking a black strand of wayward hair behind the boy’s ear. Marvolo sighed again and Harry patted his back as they continued watching the scene._

_“Am Hawwy!” The boy, or, if he guessed correctly, Harry, babbled. “Papa got angwy wiff’ Sevvy.” Black brows furrowed in an angry, adorable pout._

_“Oh, dear. That’s awful.” Tom cooed, brushing away the rapidly falling snow that had landed on Harry’s messy locks. “Would you like to go someplace where they are not fighting, Harry?”_

* * *

The scene doesn’t continue much further. Baby Harry accepted Teen Tom’s hand and got whisked away from the Alley, only because of Tom’s bribery of treacle tart.

TMRHJP-0000012587-01’s, or simply this dimension’s, Tom Riddle snorted as the scene ended and leaned back against the couch, he sat on. Harry, on the other hand, was still staring where the hologram was before looking at the dimension jumpers in front of them.

“So,” He started before he got a loss of words, not even knowing how to breach the subject. He sighed and ran a hand through his face before continuing. “That Tom kidnapped that Harry?” Harry asked and James nodded sagely as if he was this dimension’s Dumbledore giving a solemn apology. It disgusted Marvolo to no end.

“Yup.”

“And The Marauders including Severus didn’t notice shit?”

James nodded sagely again in affirmation and Harry’s incredulous expression only grew, ignoring Tom’s soft chide of his language as he thought.

“Care to think on that during lunch?” Marvolo asked, glancing at Tom across from him and the Dark Lord nodded at the silent question. No matter how hostile Tom was to Marvolo, he could count on the dimension jumper to understand the hardest concepts of logic and philosophy if Harry couldn’t.

Harry sighed and nodded. He wasn’t that perplexed about it nor he was shocked in any way. It was just the possibilities running through his head when he had the privilege to see other dimensions. Despite being the Master of Death, Death wasn’t keen on doing anything for Harry for small reasons and wishes like that.

Marvolo stood up and put glamour on himself; his coifed brown hair turned into a longer, much richer black undercut. James huffed when Marvolo’s features grew much softer than usual and it suddenly hit James that Marvolo was subtly basing his looks to look like the infamous Theseus Scamander with Grindelwald’s haircut.

James sighed before putting a glamour on himself too. His dark bird’s nest (which was quite tame by the way) turned blonde and much curlier than before. The indescribable mane coiled into tight curls falling to the left side of his face. His face turned more into a fusion of Sirius Black and Remus lupin just because James wanted to and for the fact that he wanted to mess with them.

Harry laughed a gleeful and manic one when he realized what James was about to do. Tom only rolled his eyes at the sight.


End file.
